Hardest Job: Week in the Shoes of a Single Parent

This week I tip my hat to the hardest working people in the world: the single parents.

For one week every March, I find myself in this circumstance. My husband coaches baseball for Noble and Greenough and, during March break, the team heads to Florida for their annual spring training trip. As proud as I am of their dedication to the sport, it leaves me to handle the Shumway clan as a single parent. It’s a five-day exercise for me and I plan, shop, cook and ferry them around – but I know that it’s a finite period of time, with a bright light at the end of the short tunnel. I’m extremely fortunate.

This is my first year doing it with three kids (last year, the team practiced locally), and it’s daunting to say the least. I spent Sunday looking at recipes, clipping coupons and planning out menus for the week. I wrote down schedules on the whiteboard to help keep track of who goes where and when they need to be there. I knew when Andy would leave and when he would come home. Five days gone, friends and family in place, and we are doing okay. A solid mental “Mom of the Year” pat on the back.

But, it’s just for five days.

I think about all of those single parents out there and I am amazed at how they do it. For them, every day, they wake up, get their kids ready for school, go to work, pick up the kids, feed them, bathe them, help them with their homework, and get them to bed – only to start the whole process again the next morning.

Being a single parent is, without a doubt, the hardest job in the world.

Let’s take a look at my yesterday. I did two drop-offs, worked all day, made dinner, picked up son from a friend’s house, picked up baby at daycare, picked up daughter at kindergarten aftercare, dropped off daughter at gymnastics, brought boys home, fed boys, bathed boys, drove everyone back to get daughter at gymnastics, got daughter in the shower, put all kids to bed, collapsed on sofa.

I am in awe of how single parents manage this schedule every day of their lives. They sacrifice their own time for the backing-and-forthing that is their kids’ agendas.

I realized that my husband and I have perfected the “Patience Dance.” In other words, when the kids push one parent so far that they lose their cool, the other parent steps in to diffuse the time bomb (or save the childrens’ lives, depending on what they did to send said grownup over the edge). Single parents have no partner to play off, to share carpooling duties and household chores with – and they do the Patience Dance solo. They go it alone, and to me, it’s so admirable. What lucky kids to have such good role models.

I said it before and I’ll say it again, single parents amaze me. Having to do it just five days a year, I realize how hard it is and there’s no doubt about it, single moms and dads have my utmost respect.

So although I get to share parental responsibilities in just a few short days, I’m definitely better for having walked a mile in a single parent’s shoes, even if it’s a really short mile!